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They Came Back (2004)

Zombies in old man slacks, now there's entertainment!
Zombies in old man slacks, now there's entertainment!

Genre: Zombie Drama Fantasy Sci-Fi (France)

Starring: Geraldine Pailhas, Jonathan Zaccaï (The Beat That My Heart Skipped)

Directed By: Robin Campillo

Overview: When the recently deceased come back to life, healthy and human, a town in France tried to reintegrate these slightly different people back into society, while still trying to understand their mysteries.

Performance:

The roles were decent, the dead creeped me out just enough, the players did their jobs. I have no problem with them. Nothing spectacular, however, because I couldn't get past how they weren't adressing anything!
Rating: 7

Cinematography:

The overall look of the film was professional and there were a few interesting scenes with the heat-sensitive video system they had all set up. Again however, nothing spectacular. Professional. We'll leave it at that.
Rating: 7

Script:

The moments where the city council held their meetings and explained things to us were terrifically done. While being apprehensive and cautious, they were hopeful, and explored all sides of their dilema. Very logical and informative in their approach we felt as lost as they were. The interpersonal stuff? Boring, uninteresting and it not do all that much to enlighten us. In fact it seemed as though they were intentionally being vague, like a thriller would, EXCEPT THEY DIDN'T TELL US ANYTHING IN THE END. Terrible!
Rating: 6

Plot:

"They came back!" *SHRIEK!* If this had happened in New York City, utter chaos would have broken out, people running around with shotguns in the streets, blasting perfectly healthy shambling non-corpses. After a couple of weeks of rioting, the 'Revenants' would have eventually been reintroduced to society, harmless as they are. I think that would have been a better social commentary on humanity than the 'small French town' approach. What a slow movie. It was trying to be High Art Drama, but I didn't get the point. And to not explain the 'why' of the ending made my face pucker like I ate a rancid lemon.
Rating: 4

Mood:

They should have kept the French title The Revenants, because it's an English word too: one that returns after death or a long absence. More appropriate, definately. There was constant flurry of little decisions like these that changed the direction of the story and left way too many questions unanswered. I was left wanting, wondering where, why, and what was going on. It's hard to get into a film when you're not even on the radar. The classic retort of the Eurotrash Elite would be to say that I'm uncultured, I'm not a European. I say think of your audience. You're making a film for THEM not for YOU. They, being me, hated it.
Rating: 5

Even the zombie humping isn't hot... or horofic... or mildly shambly... it's just kinda... lazy... and there's no kind of eating
Even the zombie humping isn't hot... or horofic... or mildly shambly... it's just kinda... lazy... and there's no kind of eating

Overall Rating: 56% (They Never Should Have Left)
Aftertaste:

Stupidest zombie movie ever. They're not even rotting. It starts with a suspension of disbelief so grand that 30 minutes into it I decided to finally give in to the rediculous premise. Sadly, my thoughts went on to different questions. What about disease? What about people creamated? What about criminals who died with terms still left to serve? The question the writer asked was, "Oh cool how would it affect this little town? I'm so original and witty." Well stop frustrating us you moron and answer the first five questions that come to mind. Mention the outside world. Stop pissing off your viewers with your blunted and microcosmic vision.

You offend me sir.

| | | | | | | |

    1. The criminals with time to serve thing was answered.

    2. The outside world was mentioned a couple of times to reinforce that the events weren't unique to that one town.

    3. It's not a zombie movie. The traditional "revenant" is not synonymous with "zombie". Read the book.

    4. Watch it in French without subtitles - it makes more sense (at least, it did for us), and the translation misses a few key mixed meanings.


1. And what was the damn answer?

2. Wow, where's all the shootouts?

3. Eff Off, I want brains.

4. As if I'd even spend another minute on this dog vomit.

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