GoldenEye (1995)

Intense. Oh! Kind of like the movie!

Bond: Pierce Brosnan (Die Another Day • Tomorrow Never Dies)

Bond Girl: Natalya Fyodorovna Simonova  Played By: Izabella Scorupco (Exorcist: The Beginning • Reign of Fire)
Bond Villain: General Arkady Grigorovich Ourumov  Played By: Gottfried John ("Berlin Alexanderplatz" • The Ogre)
Villain's Goon: Xenia Zirgavna Onatopp  Played By: Famke Janssen (X-Men • Taken)

Genre: Action Adventure Thriller (USA, UK) 

Directed By: Martin Campbell (Casino Royale • The Mask of Zorro)

Overview: GoldenEye is a devastating electromagnetic pulse satellite weapon. When the rogue general Uromov hijacks the command key, Bond has only the sieged base's lone survivor to help him stop the general from using the weapon on civilized nations.

Many people think that Timothy Dalton was replaced as Bond because of less than exemplary box office success, but the fact is that he was tired of waiting for the next film to come and decided to pursue other acting opportunities. After the release of Licence to Kill in 1989, legal troubles delayed production of the next Bond film for an unprecedented 6 years, triple the usual wait time of most 007 films. GoldenEye, by now thought by some to be irrelevant in this post-Cold War age, ended up being very successful indeed. Why you may ask? Cause it's well crafted and refreshingly different…ish.

There is so much going on for GoldenEye that makes it great for anyone, and extra special for Bond fans.

Most importantly we have a female goon, and she's not merely a 'doer with a gun', she's a versatile agent. Xenia Zirgavna Onatopp is the second of the female goons in the series so far, and the first who isn't a chilling, creepy Amazon, she's a woman who kills men with her thighs while having awesome crazy rough sex with them. In fact I'd even say she's a favourite - not only cause she's a total babe, but her character, besides wielding a mass assassin's assault rifle and delivering cold-heart-proving puns after she goes on a kill spree, is also a plot-advancing helicopter pilot and a worthy adversary. In fact I think I love her… as one of my favourite bond Goons ever.

GoldenEye surprised me with it's uber-slick soundtrack and gross disregard for human life. Bad guys who use nuke-grade weapons when they're sick of just mowing innocents down the old fashioned way are not a rarity in Bond 17. Even characters who are a little different than usual enhance the originality, like the geeky egomaniacal programmer type with a misguided sense of importance.

Pierce Brosnan was never a fan of the one liners and it's pretty obvious in GoldenEye. There's less of them and they aren't delivered as coldly as they were in the Connery days, but don't mistake that for a heightened degree of realism. The opening sequence will prove that right out the window, what with dramatic stunts like jumping off a cliff in hopes of catching up to that plane. As always though, the characters, the gadgetry and a gloriously action-packed finale make GoldenEye a welcome addition to the superspy franchise, showing this critic at least that there is much hope for Pierce in the films to come.

Bond Cars:

The ever popular Aston Marten DB5 is the Bentley that James drives and the BMW he's assigned that's equipped with radar, self-destruct and parachute and stinger missiles is the Z3.

Bond Gadgets:

A leather belt with repelling wire a pen grenade a watch with frikken laser beams on it.

A mini grappling hook.

A laser gun cutting tool.

A monocular (?) with digital photo and James can even have it print out in his car.

 
Usually onatopp of every situation

Performance: 9 Cinematography: 9 Script: 8 Plot: 8 Mood: 8

Overall Rating: 84% (She Sparkles!)

SuperSpyStats

Personal bodycount: 22!

Foiled Assassinations: 6

Near Misses: 0

Dames Bedded: 2

Martinis Drank: 0

What's all this?